Friday, March 03, 2006
This is what happens when us commandos get deployed to parachute into enemy territory during a war:
War is imminent. Redland Armed Forces are gathering their forces, preparing to invade our tiny little island. To cripple their capabilities, Singapore is launching a pre-emptive special operation strike deep into enemy territory. Commandos are to prepare to infiltrate via airborne means.
So, we'll gather in the wee hours of the morning, and wait an excruciating 1 hour for roll call to end. Since its wartime, we'll be hastily rushed to the airbase (gasp, i'd better not reveal which airbase it is.. what if Big Brother is watching?), no doubt to make up for lost time during the 1 hour rollcall.
At the airbase, we'd all have to leave our vehicles and book in at the access control point, another excruciatingly long process. Here they'll make us walk through metal detectors, check our pockets, clothes, hair, backside, underwear, and even the spaces between our toes, to make sure that we dont bring in any media storage devices or -gasp-, heaven forbid, a CAMERA PHONE. The Bane of All SAF Camps.
(So yes, potential enemies can take note that all you need to do to delay our Commandos from parachuting from planes is to plant a camera phone in his bag. They wont even let him 50m near the airbase)
Well yes, after FINALLY getting into the airbase we'd all have to troop into a humungous hangar to wait for (thoseluckybastards) pilots, who seem to have the best lives in the world, to come and fly the plane and start our jump task. This mandatory (yet unneccessary) wait usually takes an hour or more. Of course, when the time comes for the task to start, the airbase will suddenly tell us that "The wind is too strong", or "There's some admin problem", such that we'd have to wait ANOTHER 1.5 hours, before telling us that the jump is cancelled.
By then, the war would've started.
What. A. Bloody. Waste. Of. Time.
he rocked the party at 8:33 AM |
